So working nights I have a lot of free time in the morning. Really I don't know what to do with myself. So I've composed a list of stuff I've always wanted to do just never had the time or energy to do it. Well, this is me taking the initiative and getting out there and trying some new stuff. It's time to live a little. I probably won't do all this, but it's a list of stuff I'm thinking of doing. If you wanna do it with me, help me with it, or have other ideas or anything, lemme know. :)
1. Write a book
2. Scrapbook
3. Quilt
4. Learn guitar/piano
5. Take some random classes
6. Become a critic (food, movie, music...)
7. Write and record a song
8. Become a Youtube sensation
9. Knit/crochet
10. Learn how to cook/bake
11. Learn more about cars
12. Paint/sketch
13. Volunteer
14. Take up photography
15. Study the Bible
16. Tour Iowa
17. Visit Museums/Zoos/Galleries
18. Study Religions
19. Read all the books on my shelves
20. Go to Concerts
Ok, really that's a long enough list for now. Now I know a lot of this takes money but really it doesn't take a lot. And I'm slowly moving up in the world. I just feel like I could be doing so much more with my life then sleeping and working. My good friend, Samuel and my bestie, Lindsey and possibly my good acquaintance Jordan, are going to be dragged along on a lot of my adventures. Mainly, because I don't like doing things by myself and also because I love them so dearly and want them to have fun as well. This is not really a bucket list, just a list of things that sound exciting to me. Not that I don't love sitting around my apartment listening to One Direction, but really something's gotta change. I've already started googling a lot of this stuff and it all seems super easy. Even a blond like me can do it.
Thursday, September 27, 2012
Tuesday, September 11, 2012
Influenced and Influencing
I guess it never truly dawned on me how many people influence my life. In good and bad ways. The people that are in my life that are encouraging, help me spiritually, challenge me, lead me in the right ways. The people that are in my life that don't exactly do that. The ones I let influence me and the ones I choose to not let influence me. The ones that aren't bad influences but aren't the best influences. People that don't even know they influence me. The ones I don't think influence me. Everything that they do, some how has an effect on my life. Every person in my life makes a difference in my life. Good or bad.
I never realized the kind of influence I am on people. Am I encouraging, uplifting, and challenging them spiritually? Am I leading them down the path of righteousness or bringing them down? Am I a good testimony? Am I really the best influence I can be? Everything I do, effects the people in my life. I make a difference in someone's life.
God uses us in people's lives. I have been super challenged the past couple days. What kind of influence am I? Who am I letting influence me? Everything we do truly does effect someone. We have to be super careful how our actions, words, and lives are influencing people. We're human, we're not perfect but at the same time we should be striving to be more like Christ and striving to show Christ to others.
I have recently made some resolutions that I hope to stick to not just for God or for my sake, but for the sake of other's that I influence. I need to better myself for God's glory, for my walk, and for my friends and coworkers. If I become a better person, other people can become better people in the process. You don't truly realize the impact you make until someone brings it to your attention. And I'm lucky enough to have friends that bring my actions to my attention, whether they are good or bad. I'm lucky to say I have some great influences in my life. And I want to be a great influence.
Thursday, September 6, 2012
Life Track
So I have made a soundtrack of my life right now.
My most played song is of course "Somebody that I use to know." Lots to be explained behind that but I'm not going into it. But it is really my song right now.
"On my Own" by Ashes Remain has been a most played song for a while.
"Some nights" by Fun. Mostly just because it's catchy and gets stuck in my head.
"We are never ever getting back together." Also because it's catchy and the video is hysterical but it has some stuff behind it.
"Busted heart" by For King and Country.
"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger" by Kelly Clarkson
Some of these songs are really self explanatory as to why they are a big deal in my life. Music really is my escape and so they describe me so well. I may not be an open book but look at my most played on Itunes and you'll figure me out pretty quickly.
"Why don't you love me." by Hot Chelle Rae
"Bombshell Blond" and "Take it all away" by Owl City. Like them both for two totally different reasons.
"Wide awake" by Katy Perry
"Last Train Home" by Ryan Star.
Now mind you some of these songs don't express all my feelings they are just good when I have feelings.
"Waiting outside the lines" By Greyson Chance
"Love you til the End" by the Pogues
"Someday came Today" by Chris Pine
"I won't Give Up" by Jason Mraz
And I know a lot of these songs are secular but music just makes me better. Or just helps me express myself. it always has. Why do you think people write songs? It's easier to express through music than it is to come right out and say it. I think that's how I'm going to do things from now on. I have a problem with you, I need to tell you something, I need to let something out? I'm just going to send you a song that best expresses that point.
My music choices change based on my mood, my attitude, my awakeness. It all just varies. But in the end my point is: Music. That's how I do things. I sing, I dance, I cry, I listen to one track over and over again. I know all the words. I know what it means. I feel the feelings in the song. It becomes a part of me. That's why I love choir so much. It's how I express everything. Worship, heartache, love, disappointment. It's all through song.
These songs that I have named tonight are not all the ones that I listen to, but they are the ones that have stood out to me and meant a lot to me for a while. My soundtrack to my life could just go on and on. There are so many songs I love that mean a lot to me.
Each one of my close friends has a song to me. We each have our song. It's not weird or anything. It's not just a bf/gf thing. My friends each have their songs. Why? because if the song reminds me of a friend it will make me smile and make me want to listen to it and remember my friend. It's a happy thing. If I dub a song for you, than take it cuz that's a big deal.
Music. It's a big deal to me.
That's all.
My most played song is of course "Somebody that I use to know." Lots to be explained behind that but I'm not going into it. But it is really my song right now.
"On my Own" by Ashes Remain has been a most played song for a while.
"Some nights" by Fun. Mostly just because it's catchy and gets stuck in my head.
"We are never ever getting back together." Also because it's catchy and the video is hysterical but it has some stuff behind it.
"Busted heart" by For King and Country.
"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger" by Kelly Clarkson
Some of these songs are really self explanatory as to why they are a big deal in my life. Music really is my escape and so they describe me so well. I may not be an open book but look at my most played on Itunes and you'll figure me out pretty quickly.
"Why don't you love me." by Hot Chelle Rae
"Bombshell Blond" and "Take it all away" by Owl City. Like them both for two totally different reasons.
"Wide awake" by Katy Perry
"Last Train Home" by Ryan Star.
Now mind you some of these songs don't express all my feelings they are just good when I have feelings.
"Waiting outside the lines" By Greyson Chance
"Love you til the End" by the Pogues
"Someday came Today" by Chris Pine
"I won't Give Up" by Jason Mraz
And I know a lot of these songs are secular but music just makes me better. Or just helps me express myself. it always has. Why do you think people write songs? It's easier to express through music than it is to come right out and say it. I think that's how I'm going to do things from now on. I have a problem with you, I need to tell you something, I need to let something out? I'm just going to send you a song that best expresses that point.
My music choices change based on my mood, my attitude, my awakeness. It all just varies. But in the end my point is: Music. That's how I do things. I sing, I dance, I cry, I listen to one track over and over again. I know all the words. I know what it means. I feel the feelings in the song. It becomes a part of me. That's why I love choir so much. It's how I express everything. Worship, heartache, love, disappointment. It's all through song.
These songs that I have named tonight are not all the ones that I listen to, but they are the ones that have stood out to me and meant a lot to me for a while. My soundtrack to my life could just go on and on. There are so many songs I love that mean a lot to me.
Each one of my close friends has a song to me. We each have our song. It's not weird or anything. It's not just a bf/gf thing. My friends each have their songs. Why? because if the song reminds me of a friend it will make me smile and make me want to listen to it and remember my friend. It's a happy thing. If I dub a song for you, than take it cuz that's a big deal.
Music. It's a big deal to me.
That's all.
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
Somebody that I used to know
Like when you said you felt so happy you could die
Told myself that you were right for me
But felt so lonely in your company
But that was love and it's an ache I still remember
You can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness
Like resignation to the end, always the end
So when we found that we could not make sense
Well you said that we would still be friends
But I'll admit that I was glad it was over
But you didn't have to cut me off
Make out like it never happened and that we were nothing
And I don't even need your love
But you treat me like a stranger and that feels so rough
No you didn't have to stoop so low
Have your friends collect your records and then change your number
I guess that I don't need that though
Now you're just somebody that I used to know
Now you're just somebody that I used to know
Now you're just somebody that I used to know
[Kimbra:]
Now and then I think of all the times you screwed me over
But had me believing it was always something that I'd done
But I don't wanna live that way
Reading into every word you say
You said that you could let it go
And I wouldn't catch you hung up on somebody that you used to know
[Gotye:]
But you didn't have to cut me off
Make out like it never happened and that we were nothing
And I don't even need your love
But you treat me like a stranger and that feels so rough
No you didn't have to stoop so low
Have your friends collect your records and then change your number
I guess that I don't need that though
Now you're just somebody that I used to know
[x2]
Somebody
(I used to know)
Somebody
(Now you're just somebody that I used to know)
(I used to know)
(That I used to know)
(I used to know)
Somebody
Sunday, August 19, 2012
The World Still Turns
Bitterness and Anger never make you happy.
Holding on to the past never gets you through.
Time goes on, things change.
People and their lives change too.
Holding everything thing just makes you miserable.
Grudges and hatred rip lives apart.
Honesty is the only way to make things ok.
Letting things go is good for your heart.
Friends fight and disagree.
You're not going to always see things eye to eye.
Love covers a multitude of sins.
Forgiveness is always worth a try.
Time passes on and things seem to change.
The world continues to turn.
Past is the past.
Nothing stays the same.
Feelings get hurt.
Hearts get broken.
Promises are made.
Promises are broken.
Humans are fallible.
They are not to be trusted.
Plans are made.
Plans get adjusted.
Friends come and go, relationships change.
Sometimes things are not meant to be the same.
Love covers a multitude of sins.
The worlds still turns just the same.
Things might be different than they were just a few months ago.
Things may be better than they were before.
But things are better in more ways than one.
Now we have each come to a new door.
Leave it in the Lord's hands, that's what I try to do now.
Vengeance is mine, says the Lord.
And with the friends that I've got, I've seemed to make it through.
As long as I keep my nose in His Word.
It will all work out the way that He wills.
I can't always make choices for everyone.
It's God's place to make the plan.
I've just got to pray for everyone.
I haven't blogged in a while, and here I am sitting on my bed, thinking over the past couple months. Moving, break ups, fights, and awkwardness. New friends and old friends, lost friends and found friends. Struggles and trials, mishaps and adventures. My life definitely is different than it was months ago. Happy and content, quiet and peaceful, would describe my life here in small town Iowa. But with every good thing comes struggles as well. Life isn't going to be perfect anywhere. There's always going to be hard times. It's how you respond to them that matters. I like my life. Don't worry too much about me. The world still turns whether I'm struggling or not. God's still in control, He knows what he's doing. I'll be ok. He'll get me through. He's done it for 24 years, He'll keep doing it too.
Holding on to the past never gets you through.
Time goes on, things change.
People and their lives change too.
Holding everything thing just makes you miserable.
Grudges and hatred rip lives apart.
Honesty is the only way to make things ok.
Letting things go is good for your heart.
Friends fight and disagree.
You're not going to always see things eye to eye.
Love covers a multitude of sins.
Forgiveness is always worth a try.
Time passes on and things seem to change.
The world continues to turn.
Past is the past.
Nothing stays the same.
Feelings get hurt.
Hearts get broken.
Promises are made.
Promises are broken.
Humans are fallible.
They are not to be trusted.
Plans are made.
Plans get adjusted.
Friends come and go, relationships change.
Sometimes things are not meant to be the same.
Love covers a multitude of sins.
The worlds still turns just the same.
Things might be different than they were just a few months ago.
Things may be better than they were before.
But things are better in more ways than one.
Now we have each come to a new door.
Leave it in the Lord's hands, that's what I try to do now.
Vengeance is mine, says the Lord.
And with the friends that I've got, I've seemed to make it through.
As long as I keep my nose in His Word.
It will all work out the way that He wills.
I can't always make choices for everyone.
It's God's place to make the plan.
I've just got to pray for everyone.
I haven't blogged in a while, and here I am sitting on my bed, thinking over the past couple months. Moving, break ups, fights, and awkwardness. New friends and old friends, lost friends and found friends. Struggles and trials, mishaps and adventures. My life definitely is different than it was months ago. Happy and content, quiet and peaceful, would describe my life here in small town Iowa. But with every good thing comes struggles as well. Life isn't going to be perfect anywhere. There's always going to be hard times. It's how you respond to them that matters. I like my life. Don't worry too much about me. The world still turns whether I'm struggling or not. God's still in control, He knows what he's doing. I'll be ok. He'll get me through. He's done it for 24 years, He'll keep doing it too.
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
So here it goes...
I don't even know where to begin. Today has been so overwhelming. It has no reason to be. But once you turn my mind on it just goes. I wish there was a way to just turn it off. That would probably make my life easier. (Not like I have it on much of the time anyway)
I'm a worry wart. I worry about things I probably shouldn't. I look to far into the future and freak out about stuff that I don't even need to be thinking about yet. Or I look at things that are coming up soon and freak out because they are practically here. The one thing that got my mind going is graduation in 30 days. It's not like I'm in school anymore, but graduation is the next big step in my life. It's something to mark off my list. What happens after that I don't know. Maybe nothing will change. maybe everything will change. It will be official. I'm an adult. I have to grow up. What to do with that degree? Where to go from here? What to do with my life? How to spend my time? Where do I need to work? What will I do when all my friends leave? So many questions arise. One event can cause so much worry.
I'm scared to death about where my life might be going. I feel like I have no direction, no purpose. I seem to get that way a lot. Maybe it's just because I don't consult my Father after I get settled into where I want to be. Once I figure where I am where God wants me, I slack off on devotions and asking Him about everything. I just get in a rut. Things won't go the way I plan if they aren't going the way He plans.
I add all these things to my stress level that have no right to be there. I shouldn't worry about who I'm going to marry. I shouldn't worry about where I'm going to spend my life. I shouldn't worry about anything really. Worrying doesn't help. It just makes me sick and depressed.
I don't know how many people today asked if I was ok. I'm usually loud and talkative and happy. But when my mind is weighed down, I just have no desire to exist. So I'm quiet. And that is quiet shocking.
I don't know if you can tell, but I'm freaking out. I'm just exhausted and completely drained. I have so much to do and plan for in the next coming months. I have to find a new job, eventually a place to live, have to start paying bills, planning trips, preparing for camp, join or not join a church. The to do list is never ending. I'm so use to people making the decisions for me, my parents getting me through life, other people to lean on. Now it's just me. I have to do this on my own.
I literally have been having panic attacks. There is times I just stop and think and I have a hard time breathing because I'm either scared to death or just totally overwhelmed. My chest will just hurt and my head will spin. Even right now I'm feeling a little dizzy.
So many questions and right now there are very little answers. I can't even explain everything that is going through my head right now. I just wanna curl up in my bed and stay here forever. Maybe a good cry will help.
I was reminded tonight by a good friend that I should pray. Why do I keep forgetting about the power of prayer? Why do I keep forgetting that I have people that love me and want to help me? People that are there for me? Why do I think I need to just suffer in silence and do everything on my own?
I need a schedule. A better routine.
No, what I need is God.
This is only skimming the surface of my thought pool. If people could read minds, they would just get confused in mine.
I just rambled on but maybe if you think of me you'll just pray. And now maybe I'll start praying again.
I'm a worry wart. I worry about things I probably shouldn't. I look to far into the future and freak out about stuff that I don't even need to be thinking about yet. Or I look at things that are coming up soon and freak out because they are practically here. The one thing that got my mind going is graduation in 30 days. It's not like I'm in school anymore, but graduation is the next big step in my life. It's something to mark off my list. What happens after that I don't know. Maybe nothing will change. maybe everything will change. It will be official. I'm an adult. I have to grow up. What to do with that degree? Where to go from here? What to do with my life? How to spend my time? Where do I need to work? What will I do when all my friends leave? So many questions arise. One event can cause so much worry.
I'm scared to death about where my life might be going. I feel like I have no direction, no purpose. I seem to get that way a lot. Maybe it's just because I don't consult my Father after I get settled into where I want to be. Once I figure where I am where God wants me, I slack off on devotions and asking Him about everything. I just get in a rut. Things won't go the way I plan if they aren't going the way He plans.
I add all these things to my stress level that have no right to be there. I shouldn't worry about who I'm going to marry. I shouldn't worry about where I'm going to spend my life. I shouldn't worry about anything really. Worrying doesn't help. It just makes me sick and depressed.
I don't know how many people today asked if I was ok. I'm usually loud and talkative and happy. But when my mind is weighed down, I just have no desire to exist. So I'm quiet. And that is quiet shocking.
I don't know if you can tell, but I'm freaking out. I'm just exhausted and completely drained. I have so much to do and plan for in the next coming months. I have to find a new job, eventually a place to live, have to start paying bills, planning trips, preparing for camp, join or not join a church. The to do list is never ending. I'm so use to people making the decisions for me, my parents getting me through life, other people to lean on. Now it's just me. I have to do this on my own.
I literally have been having panic attacks. There is times I just stop and think and I have a hard time breathing because I'm either scared to death or just totally overwhelmed. My chest will just hurt and my head will spin. Even right now I'm feeling a little dizzy.
So many questions and right now there are very little answers. I can't even explain everything that is going through my head right now. I just wanna curl up in my bed and stay here forever. Maybe a good cry will help.
I was reminded tonight by a good friend that I should pray. Why do I keep forgetting about the power of prayer? Why do I keep forgetting that I have people that love me and want to help me? People that are there for me? Why do I think I need to just suffer in silence and do everything on my own?
I need a schedule. A better routine.
No, what I need is God.
This is only skimming the surface of my thought pool. If people could read minds, they would just get confused in mine.
I just rambled on but maybe if you think of me you'll just pray. And now maybe I'll start praying again.
Monday, March 5, 2012
Conviction
That's going to be the name of my life story when it becomes a movie.
So I don't get convicted like normal people. When I'm convicted, I really get convicted. Like God will tap on my shoulder every now and than and I'll just brush it off. But than when he really wants to get my attention after a while, He just punches me in the face. That's the only way I really listen. My whole chest hurts when God pushes. It's a good thing. I'll actually listen if God gives me a clear sign. I'm too blond to get His hints. He still tries to be subtle so maybe I'll learn but I still haven't gotten it. Not that I like getting punched in the face, but it sure does make it easier for me to know what God wants me to do.
So God threw a job to me. That was awesome. God also gave me some pretty cool friends to also point me in the right direction. Well, Sunday, God gave me Phil Betz to finally make me decide to go to camp. Yep, looks like I'm going to go to IRBC for a week this summer. Hopefully, as an assistant counselor for jr high week. But we'll see. I just decided this yesterday so I have til April to really make up my mind and get everything together. I just know that Sunday afternoon service was rough for me. I was clammy and fidgeting and achey and I just couldn't look at Pastor Phil at all. God was definitely laying it pretty heavy on my heart to go. I talked to my parentals about it and they told me to go for it! So did pretty much everyone I talked to. It's totally going to push me out of my comfort zone but that's good right. I never stay in a comfort zone for too long. Usually God comes along and pops my happy bubble and makes me expand to new things. Sometimes I'm not a big fan but like always it turns out to be awesome.
I talk in lot of metaphors. It's pretty fun. You should try it sometime. My thoughts are kind of speghetti and meatballs up in my head so in order for it all to make sense and not just be a big mess, I have to explain it in a way to put it all in a bowl for ya. (Like that one? ;)
Anyways, I think life is pretty much coming together now that I'm focusing on what God wants me to do. He has led me a pretty long way. Hopefully, I can keep it up and stay on the straight and narrow.
I'm getting my invites for graduation done up. Only 2 months left! Than all I have to worry about is work and getting ready for camp.
God is good. All the time.
Live long and prosper my friends.
So I don't get convicted like normal people. When I'm convicted, I really get convicted. Like God will tap on my shoulder every now and than and I'll just brush it off. But than when he really wants to get my attention after a while, He just punches me in the face. That's the only way I really listen. My whole chest hurts when God pushes. It's a good thing. I'll actually listen if God gives me a clear sign. I'm too blond to get His hints. He still tries to be subtle so maybe I'll learn but I still haven't gotten it. Not that I like getting punched in the face, but it sure does make it easier for me to know what God wants me to do.
So God threw a job to me. That was awesome. God also gave me some pretty cool friends to also point me in the right direction. Well, Sunday, God gave me Phil Betz to finally make me decide to go to camp. Yep, looks like I'm going to go to IRBC for a week this summer. Hopefully, as an assistant counselor for jr high week. But we'll see. I just decided this yesterday so I have til April to really make up my mind and get everything together. I just know that Sunday afternoon service was rough for me. I was clammy and fidgeting and achey and I just couldn't look at Pastor Phil at all. God was definitely laying it pretty heavy on my heart to go. I talked to my parentals about it and they told me to go for it! So did pretty much everyone I talked to. It's totally going to push me out of my comfort zone but that's good right. I never stay in a comfort zone for too long. Usually God comes along and pops my happy bubble and makes me expand to new things. Sometimes I'm not a big fan but like always it turns out to be awesome.
I talk in lot of metaphors. It's pretty fun. You should try it sometime. My thoughts are kind of speghetti and meatballs up in my head so in order for it all to make sense and not just be a big mess, I have to explain it in a way to put it all in a bowl for ya. (Like that one? ;)
Anyways, I think life is pretty much coming together now that I'm focusing on what God wants me to do. He has led me a pretty long way. Hopefully, I can keep it up and stay on the straight and narrow.
I'm getting my invites for graduation done up. Only 2 months left! Than all I have to worry about is work and getting ready for camp.
God is good. All the time.
Live long and prosper my friends.
Thursday, February 23, 2012
Workin Wo-man!!
So I have been working a little over a week now. It isn't that bad. It gives me something to do. All I do is sit in my cubicle and make phone calls all day. I've got it down. It just gives me a headache is all. I don't have to get up super early. I don't get home that late. It's only 15 minutes away. It's a bum kind of job lol I think I like it. I get paid so really I can't complain. Working though makes me boring though. I'm tired more too. Hopefully once I get more settled into my job, my social life will work around it.
I am so glad to have a job. I thought I was going to have to go back to New Mexico. I love my family and that would have been cool. But I like it better here. I love being in Iowa. Yeah, I hate the weather and I might complain about how much I hate Iowa. But I like it :) I might not spend the rest of my life here but for now it's nice. I also would have hated leaving all my friends and my church and the life I've made here. So it's a praise that I get to stick around.
I also learned that it is only 70 days til graduation! That's exciting :) I need to start planning for Spring Banquet and other such things.
I need to get caught up on my shows...
It's snowing again. :P
What else is there possibly to say??
I love This Means War!!!! I could see it a million times :)
I thought I had more to say but alas I do not. I am just sitting here watching Grimm. Kinda.
Oh! I got to see my Meghan this last weekend. We surprised her boyfriend. It was awesome. It made my day. It was a lot of fun. I love her so much and miss her very much when she is away. I'm trying to get her to move out here. It isn't working too well but she will give in eventually. She bought me awesome shoes for my bday!! And took me to breakfast at the Machine Shed. :) I have friends that buy me things. That's why I love them :) wait what? no. I love them cuz they are awesome!
My thoughts are so random. I just kinda go on and on lol
I'm going to end this blog with a little diddy.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue.
Grimm is creepy,
and so are you!
(Hey, you're the one reading about my personal life like a creeper :P hehe)
Oh, BTW I have not checked anything else off of my bucket list yet. You guys should get off the computer and come help me with that :P
I am so glad to have a job. I thought I was going to have to go back to New Mexico. I love my family and that would have been cool. But I like it better here. I love being in Iowa. Yeah, I hate the weather and I might complain about how much I hate Iowa. But I like it :) I might not spend the rest of my life here but for now it's nice. I also would have hated leaving all my friends and my church and the life I've made here. So it's a praise that I get to stick around.
I also learned that it is only 70 days til graduation! That's exciting :) I need to start planning for Spring Banquet and other such things.
I need to get caught up on my shows...
It's snowing again. :P
What else is there possibly to say??
I love This Means War!!!! I could see it a million times :)
I thought I had more to say but alas I do not. I am just sitting here watching Grimm. Kinda.
Oh! I got to see my Meghan this last weekend. We surprised her boyfriend. It was awesome. It made my day. It was a lot of fun. I love her so much and miss her very much when she is away. I'm trying to get her to move out here. It isn't working too well but she will give in eventually. She bought me awesome shoes for my bday!! And took me to breakfast at the Machine Shed. :) I have friends that buy me things. That's why I love them :) wait what? no. I love them cuz they are awesome!
My thoughts are so random. I just kinda go on and on lol
I'm going to end this blog with a little diddy.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue.
Grimm is creepy,
and so are you!
(Hey, you're the one reading about my personal life like a creeper :P hehe)
Oh, BTW I have not checked anything else off of my bucket list yet. You guys should get off the computer and come help me with that :P
Thursday, February 16, 2012
I worry for myself
There is something new everyday that makes me worry for my sanity. I think that it would be better for me and everyone around me if I just lived in a home. Like seriously, I break the record for doing dumb stuff. Locking my keys in my car, leaving my lights on and killing my battery, losing my keys, losing my cell phone, running out of gas, getting lost on my first day of work. It's all just stuff that happens to everybody. But all within a few weeks of each other??? I'm blond beyond belief. How have I survived 24 years?? I amaze myself. Sometimes I wonder why I don't just lock myself up in my room. I shouldn't speak either. Because the things that come out of my mouth just scare me. I don't think before I speak. What ever pops into my head comes out my mouth. Always ends badly for me. It's no wonder that I get picked on so much. I have taken up people's time and energy with the stupid things I do. How do people put up with me?? Ditzy is one thing. Than there is me. Clumsy is also another thing that you can call me. I can trip over my own feet. It's a miracle that I have never broken a bone! For real. I'm just the blondest blond I think you're going to get.
That's all for my rant for the night. I'm going to sleep.
Thank you for reading and Live long and prosper.
That's all for my rant for the night. I'm going to sleep.
Thank you for reading and Live long and prosper.
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
Best. Valentines. Ever.
I know usually this is like the worst day of the year. I hate it so much. Such a commercial holiday. Makes men go crazy. I wear all black to celebrate Single's awareness Day. Mind you, I did wear all black, but this year was different. I actually got into the Vday spirit.
My day started somewhat early. I had to fill out some paperwork for a temp agency. I went shopping for Vday gifts. I stopped in to see Lacy :) brought her goodies. Than I went to Faith and left Sonjia goodies. Than I went to Olive Garden and left Thomas goodies. lol That made the hostesses at the front smile so I made their day. And I even left a white rose for Lindsey. The cat tried to eat it :P I got random Vday texts from my friends through out the day. I got a job! Than I went and saw the most epic movie like ever,This Means War, with Lacy. Must see. OMG! She even brought me M&Ms and a sweet little card :) Than I went to Olive Garden with Nate and had the best meal ever. Shrimp marinara pasta stuff. Than I got to bed somewhat early. Over all I think it was pretty good. I didn't get to depressed about being single. I got to see some awesome friends. And I got the best gift ever! A job! this means I get to stay in Iowa.
My God is so great! The best Valentine I could ever ask for. He does such great things for me. I could never thank Him enough. Nothing I give Him could repay Him. I think the love He has for me and the love my friends give me is what made this Valentine's day the best of my life so far. Valentine's is not just for couples. There are plenty of people who you can show love to. Vday is about love, not just romance. Remember that.
My day started somewhat early. I had to fill out some paperwork for a temp agency. I went shopping for Vday gifts. I stopped in to see Lacy :) brought her goodies. Than I went to Faith and left Sonjia goodies. Than I went to Olive Garden and left Thomas goodies. lol That made the hostesses at the front smile so I made their day. And I even left a white rose for Lindsey. The cat tried to eat it :P I got random Vday texts from my friends through out the day. I got a job! Than I went and saw the most epic movie like ever,This Means War, with Lacy. Must see. OMG! She even brought me M&Ms and a sweet little card :) Than I went to Olive Garden with Nate and had the best meal ever. Shrimp marinara pasta stuff. Than I got to bed somewhat early. Over all I think it was pretty good. I didn't get to depressed about being single. I got to see some awesome friends. And I got the best gift ever! A job! this means I get to stay in Iowa.
My God is so great! The best Valentine I could ever ask for. He does such great things for me. I could never thank Him enough. Nothing I give Him could repay Him. I think the love He has for me and the love my friends give me is what made this Valentine's day the best of my life so far. Valentine's is not just for couples. There are plenty of people who you can show love to. Vday is about love, not just romance. Remember that.
Sunday, February 5, 2012
Such a thing as too much blogging?
I have been blogging a lot here lately. I have had a lot on my mind, I guess. I must say that my life here in Iowa hasn't go as I have planned. Don't get me wrong, it hasn't been all bad. I've had some great times, but there have been some bad times. I have had some struggles and I've gotten discouraged. I've had my down days. I've cried myself to sleep sometimes. I've had break downs. I'll admit that I'm scared. I don't know where my life is going to go or how to get to where I need to go. I don't know what God wants me to do. I don't know what I want to do. I don't know who to trust or who I need in my life. I don't know who needs me in their life. I don't want to waste my life away. I don't want to be waiting for something to happen. I want a job. I need something to keep me busy. Something to keep my mind from thinking so much. Thinking gets me in trouble. It never goes well when I have a lot of time to think. Because than I over analyze things. I think to much I start to panic. Just so much in my head. Sometimes it comes out to the poor soul willing to listen. Sometimes I bottle it up until I explode and go off on the poor soul willing to talk to me. Bottling up always ends bad and sometimes so does talking to people about your problems. So usually I find blogging about it so much easier. It might not make sense to the rest of you but it makes me feel better.
Crying out to God with tears in my eyes,
my pillow clenched against my chest,
wishing life could stay on it's highs,
wishing my life would just take a rest.
I only want to stop messing up
Make something important of my life
If people see me close up
They'd realize my real strife.
I need a direction
I can't see my path
Let's move on to the next section
Good time for a bubble bath
If you read this, I'm sorry
I have lots to say.
Even on a night that is starry,
I still see the grey.
Every star has a silver lining, they say
I'm waiting for the glimmer to appear
Just waiting for a sunny day,
when everything is crystal clear.
God has big plans for me, I know it's true
He has something He wants me to do.
I can't see it right now, tho.
So for now I just need love.
Saturday, February 4, 2012
Mistakes and Failures
Everyone makes mistakes right? It's a natural way of life. We all have failures in our life. We all have regrets and things we want to redo. We all mess up and do stupid things. We're human, it happens. I'm not being negative, just realistic. I'm going to mess up. I'm going to get mad, I'm going to make people mad. I'm going to get hurt, I'm going to hurt people. There are going to be awkward times, things are going to be uncomfortable. I can't be happy all the time, and I won't make people happy all the time. Things in the world aren't perfect, and people aren't perfect. Relationships are hard. Friendships take work. You can't just expect things to be good all the time. We all have our hard times. People don't always get along.
Just because I expect to fail, does not mean that I accept failure. When I fail, I strive to try harder. When I make mistakes, I learn from them and get stronger. When I mess up, I pick myself up and make things better. Our human nature wants to sin. We have to fight that nature to become more like Christ. But we sin. God is there to forgive us and love us no matter what. Even when we screw up. We just have to try and try and eventually it will get easier but sin won't go away. Life is hard. It's a struggle every day. It's only through God's grace and His power that we make it through every day.
I know I have to trust in Him and rely on Him for everything. But it's hard. I'm not the strongest Christian, I'm willing to admit. Letting God handle things is a hard thing for me to do. Prayer and trust is not my strong suit. So the closer I get to Him the better I'll be at handling my flaws. But until I try harder, I'm going to mess up. I need people to help. I need people that will point me in the right direction. People that will point me to God instead of to myself or to other people. I need friends that will stand by me and encourage me and get me on the right path. I don't want to focus my attention on people, but God puts people in your life for a reason. We as Christians have to help each other grow in Christ as a body.
I don't like making people mad. I don't like losing friends. I don't like it when relationships go bad. But it will happen. It's something we have to deal with. We learn through this that God is the one true friend we have.
Just because I expect to fail, does not mean that I accept failure. When I fail, I strive to try harder. When I make mistakes, I learn from them and get stronger. When I mess up, I pick myself up and make things better. Our human nature wants to sin. We have to fight that nature to become more like Christ. But we sin. God is there to forgive us and love us no matter what. Even when we screw up. We just have to try and try and eventually it will get easier but sin won't go away. Life is hard. It's a struggle every day. It's only through God's grace and His power that we make it through every day.
I know I have to trust in Him and rely on Him for everything. But it's hard. I'm not the strongest Christian, I'm willing to admit. Letting God handle things is a hard thing for me to do. Prayer and trust is not my strong suit. So the closer I get to Him the better I'll be at handling my flaws. But until I try harder, I'm going to mess up. I need people to help. I need people that will point me in the right direction. People that will point me to God instead of to myself or to other people. I need friends that will stand by me and encourage me and get me on the right path. I don't want to focus my attention on people, but God puts people in your life for a reason. We as Christians have to help each other grow in Christ as a body.
I don't like making people mad. I don't like losing friends. I don't like it when relationships go bad. But it will happen. It's something we have to deal with. We learn through this that God is the one true friend we have.
Friday, February 3, 2012
Poke. Poke Poke. Poke!!
So I never knew that Facebook poke wars could be so much fun. I have been having them a lot more here lately. I have bonded with people over them and I have made some pretty funny friend because of them. They make for loud intense times. There is always laughter involved and usually movie quotes are thrown in there as well. Some people may look at you funny but you know that they are amused as well.
I love being goofy. It is like my favorite thing ever. I'm good at being serious don't get me wrong but I love just being silly and making people laugh. It's what I do best. If I don't get a smile or a laugh out of someone, I try harder and eventually someone will be busting a gut. I like to think that is my gift in life-To be the comic relief. And I love it. I don't' have very many talents. So I accept the one skill I do have: Goofyness. I'm a good listener too usually, but hands down my gift is laughter.
I can usually get along with anyone. Because I make them laugh. I click with any kind of personality because I'm the funny one. I can make almost anyone feel better just by one stupid comment or a silly face. It's nice to know that I can do that for people. I don't always have the best advice, I don't have any money. I can't play sports or instruments. I know nothing about cars or guns. I bond with people through jokes and laughter. Laughter truly is contagious too. It is the best medicine. And it's a good workout for your abs. And sometimes its good for your sinuses lol
Any way you look at it, I love to laugh, I love to have fun, and I love making people happy. Not tooting my own horn here of course. God gave me a pretty sweet talent to use for His honor and glory. I just have to use it wisely and make sure I'm always encouraging.
My name is Shelly Powell and I'm a blog date survivor.
I love being goofy. It is like my favorite thing ever. I'm good at being serious don't get me wrong but I love just being silly and making people laugh. It's what I do best. If I don't get a smile or a laugh out of someone, I try harder and eventually someone will be busting a gut. I like to think that is my gift in life-To be the comic relief. And I love it. I don't' have very many talents. So I accept the one skill I do have: Goofyness. I'm a good listener too usually, but hands down my gift is laughter.
I can usually get along with anyone. Because I make them laugh. I click with any kind of personality because I'm the funny one. I can make almost anyone feel better just by one stupid comment or a silly face. It's nice to know that I can do that for people. I don't always have the best advice, I don't have any money. I can't play sports or instruments. I know nothing about cars or guns. I bond with people through jokes and laughter. Laughter truly is contagious too. It is the best medicine. And it's a good workout for your abs. And sometimes its good for your sinuses lol
Any way you look at it, I love to laugh, I love to have fun, and I love making people happy. Not tooting my own horn here of course. God gave me a pretty sweet talent to use for His honor and glory. I just have to use it wisely and make sure I'm always encouraging.
My name is Shelly Powell and I'm a blog date survivor.
Monday, January 30, 2012
Blog Date Entry
I had the longest weekend of my life. Not saying that it was a bad thing, it was just long and I felt like I did not sleep. So sitting here with my good friend Lacy and her friend Andy, is a nice release. I like just chilling and talking or looking through pictures and blogging. There is obviously not a lot of blogging going on, even though that was the main purpose. But that's ok. It's nice anyway.
I got to see my bestest friend for a few hours. It was bittersweet. We got to talk and laugh and just have a good time. I just feel like we don't see each other enough or talk enough. It makes me sad. So seeing her made my week. I wish I could see her more often. Now that she is dating Sam too makes it a lot more fun to go and see her. It was sad that our whole little group wasn't together, but Thomas had to work. We had a moment to think about him though. So he was there in spirit.
Before I went and saw Meghan, I spent a few hours out at Neveda Baptist church with a bunch of crazy teenagers playing Monopoly. It was lots of fun just to be a teenager for the day. Phil Cox spoke and it was really pretty good and very challenging. There was lots of good kids and good food and lots of Monopoly fun. I would say getting up early for that was way worth it. Good way of spending my Saturday.
I absolutely love coffee. I just learned this. I love coffee, lattes, cappuccinos, mochas, all of it. I'm just a big fan. I'm not addicted but when I can get it, I am happy. It keeps me going.
My sleeping patterns are so screwed up anymore. I stay up til 2 am or so and get up around 10 am or so.
Update on my bucket list: I haven't really done much lol I have been taking more pictures and giving more hugs and I've actually talked on the phone more and I've lost some weight. So I'm still working on it.
Let me rhyme about our time in Cafe Diem.
Ikea paper ball lights hanging over head.
Caramel Vanilla Latte is now dead.
Dwelling on Colorado memories.
Looking at Pictures and telling stories.
Sipping on Italian soda.
Remembering Mr. Rushmore and lots of nada.
A picture of an old lady in hosiery.
And the random word Rosary.
Working on blogs.
Trying not to saw some logs.
Couches made of Leather.
Happy that today had such good weather.
Maps on my chair.
Place Butt Here.
I got to see my bestest friend for a few hours. It was bittersweet. We got to talk and laugh and just have a good time. I just feel like we don't see each other enough or talk enough. It makes me sad. So seeing her made my week. I wish I could see her more often. Now that she is dating Sam too makes it a lot more fun to go and see her. It was sad that our whole little group wasn't together, but Thomas had to work. We had a moment to think about him though. So he was there in spirit.
Before I went and saw Meghan, I spent a few hours out at Neveda Baptist church with a bunch of crazy teenagers playing Monopoly. It was lots of fun just to be a teenager for the day. Phil Cox spoke and it was really pretty good and very challenging. There was lots of good kids and good food and lots of Monopoly fun. I would say getting up early for that was way worth it. Good way of spending my Saturday.
I absolutely love coffee. I just learned this. I love coffee, lattes, cappuccinos, mochas, all of it. I'm just a big fan. I'm not addicted but when I can get it, I am happy. It keeps me going.
My sleeping patterns are so screwed up anymore. I stay up til 2 am or so and get up around 10 am or so.
Update on my bucket list: I haven't really done much lol I have been taking more pictures and giving more hugs and I've actually talked on the phone more and I've lost some weight. So I'm still working on it.
Let me rhyme about our time in Cafe Diem.
Ikea paper ball lights hanging over head.
Caramel Vanilla Latte is now dead.
Dwelling on Colorado memories.
Looking at Pictures and telling stories.
Sipping on Italian soda.
Remembering Mr. Rushmore and lots of nada.
A picture of an old lady in hosiery.
And the random word Rosary.
Working on blogs.
Trying not to saw some logs.
Couches made of Leather.
Happy that today had such good weather.
Maps on my chair.
Place Butt Here.
Thursday, January 26, 2012
$1 all you can eat spaghetti!
Really who turns down an offer like that?? Especially when a handful of your closest funniest friends are going to be there.When life gets overwhelming and frustrating, it's nice just to goof off and hang out with some great people.
Everyone acts differently when put with different friends. You may be loud and obnoxious with one friend where with another you're quiet and serious. We all have those friends we can talk to and who we can goof off with. There are those friends who you can be completely yourself with and others you may hold back some. Everyone has a different personality. Sometimes we don't all get along but they are your friends nonetheless. There will be fights and awkwardness. You have to work at it. Friendship is a two way street. But the ones that stick by you through thick and thin are the ones that are worth the work.
You realize who your true friends are when you're going through a hard time. The ones that are there holding your hand or giving you encouraging words. The ones that stay up to wish you happy birthday at midnight. The ones that listen to you babble incessantly about nothing at all. The ones that can put up with your boy talk. The ones that just sit there and watch a movie with you. The one you can laugh with and laugh at. The ones that will bug you until you talk. The ones that will smack you when you're being an idiot. The ones you can text late at night just to talk. The ones that will pay for you and take you out on dates. The ones you can stay up with to the wee hours of the morning just watching youtube videos together and chatting about craziness. The ones you can play fight with and be the best of friends with when it's all over. The ones that will call you on their way home from work.
I'm lucky enough to have a handful of these amazing friends. We have our ups and downs but we all stick together. They aren't just for fun they are for the hard times too. We help each other. I may fail sometimes at being the friend I need to be but we all help each other. I praise God for the people he has put in my life.
I don't know what I would do without them. I know I talk about them a lot on here. But there is just so much to say and be thankful for. I like to brag on them.
Everyone acts differently when put with different friends. You may be loud and obnoxious with one friend where with another you're quiet and serious. We all have those friends we can talk to and who we can goof off with. There are those friends who you can be completely yourself with and others you may hold back some. Everyone has a different personality. Sometimes we don't all get along but they are your friends nonetheless. There will be fights and awkwardness. You have to work at it. Friendship is a two way street. But the ones that stick by you through thick and thin are the ones that are worth the work.
You realize who your true friends are when you're going through a hard time. The ones that are there holding your hand or giving you encouraging words. The ones that stay up to wish you happy birthday at midnight. The ones that listen to you babble incessantly about nothing at all. The ones that can put up with your boy talk. The ones that just sit there and watch a movie with you. The one you can laugh with and laugh at. The ones that will bug you until you talk. The ones that will smack you when you're being an idiot. The ones you can text late at night just to talk. The ones that will pay for you and take you out on dates. The ones you can stay up with to the wee hours of the morning just watching youtube videos together and chatting about craziness. The ones you can play fight with and be the best of friends with when it's all over. The ones that will call you on their way home from work.
I'm lucky enough to have a handful of these amazing friends. We have our ups and downs but we all stick together. They aren't just for fun they are for the hard times too. We help each other. I may fail sometimes at being the friend I need to be but we all help each other. I praise God for the people he has put in my life.
I don't know what I would do without them. I know I talk about them a lot on here. But there is just so much to say and be thankful for. I like to brag on them.
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
There goes everyone, blogging without me.
So I have basically had way to many pity parties. I don't get why I keep feeling so sorry for myself. Wah, wah! Get over it already. Everybody goes through tough times. Yeah, I have struggled with depression for a good part of my life. It's something that can be overcome, but it happens. I'm thankful for the friends that will sit there and listen to me anyway. I get in bad moods and it affects the people around me. And I'm sorry. But you guys love me anyway. And I really appreciate it. I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have my friends and my family. They always have encouraging words and are always honest with me. They help lift me up when I'm down. Even when I don't want to talk they get it out of me. They know when something is wrong and they help me fix it.
Yeah, I don't have a job. I don't have a boyfriend. I don't have a plan for my life. I'm scared and feel alone. But I have a God that never leaves or forsakes me. The other night I spent over an hour just crying and calling out to Him. And it made me feel so much better. He is the best friend I have. And he helped me so much more than any of my friends could have. I need to call out to Him more and trust Him more. That's my problem. I have a mighty God that I have been neglecting. I'm not going to be happy or content if I don't have my God leading the way. I have to let him direct my life. I can't hold the reigns of my life. I have to give them over.
God gave me the friends I have to lead me to Him. And I thank God for my friends. And I thank God that He loves me and takes care of me every day.
Thanks to a certain friend for pointing me in the right direction. :) I know I'm a stubborn butt, but you always know what to say.
Yeah, I don't have a job. I don't have a boyfriend. I don't have a plan for my life. I'm scared and feel alone. But I have a God that never leaves or forsakes me. The other night I spent over an hour just crying and calling out to Him. And it made me feel so much better. He is the best friend I have. And he helped me so much more than any of my friends could have. I need to call out to Him more and trust Him more. That's my problem. I have a mighty God that I have been neglecting. I'm not going to be happy or content if I don't have my God leading the way. I have to let him direct my life. I can't hold the reigns of my life. I have to give them over.
God gave me the friends I have to lead me to Him. And I thank God for my friends. And I thank God that He loves me and takes care of me every day.
Thanks to a certain friend for pointing me in the right direction. :) I know I'm a stubborn butt, but you always know what to say.
Thursday, January 5, 2012
Twenty Twelve!
I usually hate doing resolutions. I find no difference between a new year and a new day. We should try to better ourselves every day. New year is just another day just a new number. But this year I'm just going to jump on the band wagon for once. So my resolution this year is to make this an epic year. Not the last years haven't been epic but this one is going to be a different epic. I'm going to be crazy, grown up, free, mature, fabulous, and everything in between. I'm going to change my look, my attitude, my life. It's going to be amazing. It's going to take lots of work but I plan to make lots happen. Lacy inspired me with her bucket list blog and I'm going to make one. I want to do more than just the 10 but it's a place to start.
Bucket List!!
1. Go sledding since I've never done it. (If it ever snows up here in Iowa)
2. Lose weight. Really who doesn't want that on their list?
3. Dance in the rain.
4. Play ultimate Frisbee.
5. Buy a 50/60's style dress :)
6. Express my feelings instead of hide them.
7. Call more people instead of just text.
8. Go to the theater and see a chick flick (Shocker, I know)
9. Give more hugs.
10. Take more pictures!!
So that's just a general list for now. I want to do so much more! I want to get my devotions going better. I want to visit more churches. I want to make new friends. I want to go out on dates! There is just so much that could make this year amazing. I think I'm going to make a playlist for my life. :) it will be awesome. I love music so it describes things so well. Last year was good but really nothing amazing happened. So this year I'm going to change that. So look out world!
Bucket List!!
1. Go sledding since I've never done it. (If it ever snows up here in Iowa)
2. Lose weight. Really who doesn't want that on their list?
3. Dance in the rain.
4. Play ultimate Frisbee.
5. Buy a 50/60's style dress :)
6. Express my feelings instead of hide them.
7. Call more people instead of just text.
8. Go to the theater and see a chick flick (Shocker, I know)
9. Give more hugs.
10. Take more pictures!!
So that's just a general list for now. I want to do so much more! I want to get my devotions going better. I want to visit more churches. I want to make new friends. I want to go out on dates! There is just so much that could make this year amazing. I think I'm going to make a playlist for my life. :) it will be awesome. I love music so it describes things so well. Last year was good but really nothing amazing happened. So this year I'm going to change that. So look out world!
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