Green Lantern, Resumes, and Egg Nog

This Christmas vacation has definitely not been a time for lots of rest. 3am mornings, shopping days, doc appointments, cleaning, cooking, church. It's just been crazy. Pretty awesome :) I still haven't rested up from my crazy semester. I'm tired. The atmosphere and altitude down here might have something to do with that. I know my allergies are getting me down too.
I'm getting my resume together. It's not looking too bad. I'm hoping to get it done before I leave and send it off to a couple banks. That would be a good job, right? I don't have a very impressive resume but hey at least I have a degree :P
I'm excited for Christmas :) It doesn't feel like Christmas time though. I don't know what it is. But it looks like Christmas kinda. No snow anywhere that it is supposed to be.
Green Lantern has become my new favorite superhero movie. It is so weird and takes a while to get into it but once you do its AWESOME!
I miss my friends in Iowa. I don't have a life down here :P I love my family. I love being home! But I don't really fit in down here any more. That's ok. Everyone's got to grow up and move on sometimes.
I have way to much time to think about things when I'm down here. So I'm going crazy. I wish I could turn off my brain sometimes.
Next week, I will be in Denver hanging out with my bestie and her other bestie. :) I'm excited. Than for New Years I'm going to be with a couple of my other good friends at an awesome Murder Mystery party. Than maybe I'll go out and see New Years Eve the movie :) So I have plans for when I get back but for now I'm just living day by day down here. Things are always so unpredictable down here :D
I had a horrible headache today :P Tomorrow I go to the dentist. But first me and the fam are going to play the game Solar Quest :) twill be awesome.
Text me peeps ;)

My nose is frozen

Today is oh so very cold. Any kind of walk involves a lot of clothing.
But hey I got most everything done that I need to get done today. I just have tests to worry about and a few little things to accomplish then my college career is done. :)
Tonight I was just miss popularity. Everyone wanted time with the Shelly. I wish I could hang out with everyone at one time. Hot tub party, Birthday party, Machine shed. I just can't be in more then one place at one time though that would be awesome.
So I don't have a job anymore. That's a really long annoying story that I don't want to discuss. But I'm going home on Friday!
Dr. Bob is my favorite teacher here! He is awesome. He moved the test I was supposed to take Friday to tomorrow so I can leave earlier :)
I'm not looking forward to the drive...
This is a short blog but it's all that's kinda gone down in my day and I'm waiting for Sonjia and Chester so I had some free time.
Mazeltav!

School, Sunshine, and Socks

Naming blogs is always so much fun.
So I have learned that I have this love hate relationship with Iowa. I love being here but at the same time the weather really is the pits. I'm use to sunny December days with no snow. I'm use to it being in the 60s or 70s the whole Christmas season. I can never wear enough clothing here. I'm like bundled in scarfs, coats, leggings, and as many layers I can manage. Style doesn't come into play when you're cold lol You would think being here for 3 winters now that I would be use to Iowa weather. But I'm a true south westerner through and through.
I was reminded today at lunch that Monday is my last day of classes of my college career. It is hard to imagine. It still has not sunk in that I will be graduating. Finals then I'm going home. Then after that, no more homework!
This has been a really stressful week. Trying to balance work and school and a social life has just been difficult. Work has been a pain and I realize that I need a new job. I have to decide again if I'm going to stay home or live up here in Des Moines. Growing up and making life decisions is really not that much fun. So tears should be coming some time this week. I'm waiting for it to happen. Anyone want to be around so I have someone to snuggle with? :)
I am so behind on homework and probably should be doing that right now. Finals are coming up so I should be studying too... Weekends have not truly been weekends in a long time. I'm ready to be home and be lazy again.
So those of you who read my last blog, I hope you got a good laugh or you felt special if you were in it. When I get the urge to write, I just go and say whatever lol. I am happy to say I have quite a few good friends and some pretty awesome best friends. If it wasn't for them I wouldn't be where I am now.
I'm listening to Christmas music right now and sitting in my room by myself. I'm about to fall asleep but I have no time for a nap. There is no choir practice this afternoon. We had our cantata at church this morning. I had a froggy voice but I still sang, dang it, because I practiced hard for it! It was awesome.
There is a lot in my head right now and I can't write it all out. I probably think to much but ya know.
Anyways, I have nothing witty or funny to say right now so I guess this ends this blog.
Socks.

People, Pronouns, and the color Purple.

So my life has really nothing to do with anything in my title except for the people part. And the fact that I use pronouns all the time, but who doesn't really. And I hate the color purple. But they all start with P and I felt like being a special in naming this blog.
There is really no point behind this blog other then the fact that I'm sitting  in my room listening to my roommates sing Wicked and don't feel like doing homework. I just got back from an awesome time at Olive Garden so I figured I had plenty of time to just blog it up.
So I just want to name a few a my favorite people and list why I love and appreciate them so much.
First off, Meghan Nelson, like my best friend in the whole world. We can talk about anything and everything. We are so much alike and can totally finish each others thoughts and sentences. It's epic. It makes me happy when she visits and makes my time go by so much faster.
Next, Geoff Nerison, also like my best friend. He can make me laugh or smile no matter how I feel. He makes my day so much better just by a text. He can tell what I'm feeling and thinking without me even saying anything. That's a pretty epic friend right there.
Then comes Thomas Payne. My little heartbreaker friend. He is pretty much the gayest straight guy I know which makes him so lovable :) Don't worry I said this to his face and I don't really think he's gay at all I'm not being mean lol He's my favorite little Payne :) He makes fun of me all the time but is still always there to talk to and hang out with.
We also got Samuel Felderman. The crazy Methodist. Just his hugs alone can make your day so much better. He's a good hugger and he always has so many funny stories. He brings laughter into my life.  and he is dating my best friend so he automatically gets put into this equation lol
Sonjia Phipps! Yes, please. I have loved getting to know her better and just hanging out with her. We always have so much to talk about and always have so much fun when you put us two together. Oh and don't even let me forget when you put me her and Geoff together lol oh, good times.
Who could forget the Vances. Really I love them all. Lacy, my former roommate, who shares in my Glee obsession and who I love to talk to! My current roommate, Laura, who is positively insane! But I love coming into the room to hear her talking or singing to herself :) Daniel, of course gets thrown in here just because he is weird and makes me laugh.
My "brother and sister" Nate and Lindsey Cox. They let me come over and do laundry. Nate is there to discuss doctrine and life. Lindsey is the little evil one to rock out to Adele with! They are going to let me live with them and everything.
Of course, my parents. The ones that actually birthed me and raised me. Without them I would not be able to survive nor would I even be there. I owe them so much. I love them more then anything. They have done so much for me and I am so far  past thankful!
My real siblings. My sisters and my little brother. They are so much fun and I always miss them so much. Being mischievous with my little brother and chilling out with my sisters. We may all have different personalites and we don't always get along I still love them very much.
My dorm in general is just thrown in here. We have a plethora of people here and I love them all. They make for interesting times. I love dorm devos and I love our room. We may be a small little group, but we are a little family.
Then there's that one roommate that never really lives here but I love her anyway. I think her name is Natalie Bunjer :)
And Chester said I should add her so I am. She's kinda cool too :) hehe
Man, I just can't name everyone that I love and want to be around. It's just so difficult. But I love you all and if you were not mentioned does not mean I don't like you. I just have a short attention span and get tired of writing lol SO yeah that's it for now :)

Laughter and Tears

So not knowing what you want to do with your life really sucks. What sucks worse is not knowing what God wants to do with your life. I'm halfway through my last semester of college. This all came crashing down on me yesterday. I'm going to have to start thinking about my life outside of school. Where will I live? What will I do? Who will I marry? It's all just so overwhelming. I've chosen not to think about it really all semester and now I know why. It makes my head hurt. I spent an hour in my bed crying and calling out to God last night. It made me feel better, yeah, but didn't really give me any answers. Sitting with two of my favorite little girls today in church didn't really make it better. Now, I feel like I need another good cry. I don't wanna leave Des Moines but I wanna go home. I will miss my friends, but I have no job or place to live here. I have no boyfriend to keep me here. Everything seems to be leading for me to go home. But if you turn around, I have no friends at home. I have no work at home and the closest place to work is still a half hour away. My parents just got some new property that I might be able to live but my sister would be living with me and I would be right behind my parents. Our church is not really growing and there are no potential mates down there. Also I'd only stay in one place til May. Than I'll be back in Ankeny for graduation than me and the family are off on deputation for a few months. So really my head and life is just in a mess right now. I tell myself I need to pray about it but I don't seem to take enough time to pray. I've tried to get back into my Bible and I've been learning so much over my time here at FBBC. I've made some really Godly friends and made some really good friends. I haven't found a man and that's another thing that has been driving me crazy. I know I should be content in whatever state I'm in. but it's hard to be happy when you're so lonely and confused. I wish God would just open a door and say "Here ya go!" Than push me through it. But unfortunately, God doesn't exactly work that way. I have a paper, a test, memory verses, and reading that I have to do and I just have no desire or drive to get any of it done. I have to push through the rest of my semester but at this point I really don't want to because that means I have to start growing up and thinking about life. Why does life have to be so tough? We all wonder this. I know that my dependence and trust right now should be on God. But I'm not gonna lie, it gets really hard sometimes.
I have had so much fun getting to know my friends so much better this year. Having Geoff around has made for a lot of fun and crazy times. Getting to know Thomas better has been awesome and I have made yet another great guy friend. I have adjusted well to being away from Meghan. I've loved getting to know Sonjia better. And I've learned that I don't get along with everybody. It's been a growing year and I've made many lasting relationships. I should be happy for all the growing I have done. Dwell on the good things not the bad. But again it gets hard. But I've survived this far. I just need to suck it up and press toward the mark.

Is it bad?

That I am so ready to get out of New Mexico? That I am so ready to get to school already? That I'm ready to be done with school and move on with my life? That I can't wait to start working so I can save my money? That I can't wait to move out of my parents house and head to California? That I want to be an actress? That I want to become rich and famous? That I want to be able to help my family financially after I become famous? That I dream big?!
I have had so much stuff running through my head all summer. But I've been stuck here all summer doing absolutely nothing. Guess that's what gave me so much time to think. I have been wanting to do something go somewhere. Get on with my life. Get going already. Its just so difficult to be in New Mexico when there's nothing to do. No job no friends. Out of sight out of mind from my friends from school. It's just difficult.
I don't know who reads my blog but I know it makes me feel better.

Summer not according to plan.

So this summer has not worked out the way I want it to. I haven't gotten a job yet. Well, I had a job for a day than I got screwed. But that's a long story that just makes me mad lol. I didn't raise enough money to go to Japan. So now I have basically a month and a half left before school starts again. I'm hoping to go to Washington the end of this month for a wedding but without a job that's going to be hard. Its been a pretty good summer so far. I've found out that my health problems are just because of my thyroid so I'm on medication. And I'm also on birth control. Woopee. And my cholesterol is up so I have to get it down than go in for blood work again in October. I got my bangs cut. They didn't turn out the way I wanted them. But they aren't bad and they'll grow back. I dyed my hair red. It's not the color I wanted but its still pretty cool. I've lost 5 pounds so far. It's not as much as I wanted to lose but I'm working on it. I got a gerbil. He is fun but I don't think he likes me very much. I'm getting to spend plenty of time with my family but I still miss my friends. I don't like it when I'm away because I don't hear from people as much so I get lonely. I stay up late and sleep late so that's a plus. I've caught up on a lot of movies and my favorite shows. We haven't really gone anywhere or done anything because our finances are so bad. I planned a youth activity at church and no one from town showed up but we did have 4 kids from another church come so it was still fun. But I'm not giving up on Columbus. God kept me here for a reason. I just don't know what it is yet. I'm still not sad or depressed so that's good. the pills are probably working. This summer is still just pretty boring and a trying time for me. It's given me a lot of time to think about my future and work on things in my life. I'm not doing as good as I should spiritually but I've realized how much I've learned over the past two years when I'm in discussions at church. I can't wait til school starts back and I can get back to Iowa :)
Ok that was the longest paragraph ever! lol I'm done now. Thanks for reading.

Just an Update

I have been home since the beginning of May. After a week of fun activities with Meghan down here for a visit, life has been pretty boring. The heat, the wind, and no rain for 250 days has made my allergies pretty bad and also make it hard to do anything outside. Because of forest fires all around us there is also smoke in the air. Right now we're praying really hard for rain.
I had a sonogram done to figure out what's wrong with me. It's probably not anemia after all. I'm going in to find out the results of the sonogram on Tuesday. Hopefully, it won't be anything major and I can just take pills or something for. So I'm praying it's not a big deal.
I am supposed to be going to Japan the end of July for a two weeks missions trip. I haven't received any funds since March. I have sent out letters and am presenting at another Church this Sunday. I have two weeks to come up with $1500 more. I'm leaving it in God's hands. If I'm not able to go, I have plenty of ideas and activities planned for my church here in Columbus and also I will hopefully going to my friend's wedding in Washington and maybe Iowa. I won't be too heartbroken but it would be pretty cool to go. I'm praying for God's will in this matter.
I don't have a job yet still. Mostly because there really is nothing out here and also because of going to doctors and other such things. I'm hoping to get a job selling fireworks in June. I'm praying that that works out. If not I'm hoping to get my job back at Wal-Mart.
I have one semester of school left and I'm way excited to get back to Faith. I'm hoping to room with Meghan and Chelsi next year. Hopefully, we'll have an awesome suite and dorm. I miss everyone so much. There is no one for me to hang out with and do random stuff with out here. But there's only a couple more months left than who knows what I'm going to do.
We got in the pool for the first time today. After draining it, we finally got it clean. So it's up and running. It felt so good. I got a sunburn today :P We also worked at church before that. We pulled up bushes and picked up rocks and sticks. Next saturday, we're having our youth-a-palooza. There will be volleyball and hot dogs and all kinds of games. We're hoping to bring in some neighborhood kids and maybe bring some new people to church. If only one person comes, and that one person gets saved, it was all worth it. In a couple weeks we're having a barbecue for everyone else. We're praying all these summer activities go well and that lots of people show up. :)
That's basically it for now. I have to clean my room. My stuff from school has been piled up for weeks lol

Haven't blogged in a while so here goes...

I have been going through a lot of health problems this year. I've struggled with being sick a lot. Constantly tired, grumpy, depressed, drained, unmotivated. Come to find out all this might be linked to something more. after going to the doctors a few times, I have a list of things I may have and treatments I could go through. You never feel more scared than when a doctor tells you many things that might be wrong with you. It's a relief to know you can do something to make all the problems go away but also scary that this may be a great impact on your life. I have only a couple break downs thinking about it. But I have found it easier to trust in God for it now. I don't want to have anemia or whatever else it may be. But there is a reason for it. What that is I dont' know but God is working it out. All I can do is pray about it and go to the doctors. I am glad I have friends and family that have been there for me through it all and have been praying with and for me. I'm scared yeah but I'm not gonna worry about it. I probably will worry about it at times but that's just human of me. So I'm going to hope that I get better. I'm going to try hard to continue to make it through this semester. I can't afford to miss anymore classes or anything. But thank God I have a very understanding faculty, staff, and teachers here at school that understand and are very caring of my problems. I'm very blessed even in the midst of trouble.